Oh, and I’m doing a kitchen reorganization since it’s currently a labyrinth of cooking gadgets and specialty ingredients, all crammed into my tiny kitchen. To be honest, the kitchen isn’t that tiny, I just have so much stuff packed into it, it’s difficult to find or do anything! So I bought a storage shelf to house all my cooking gadgets and better to be able to find things when I need them. Did I mention how much I love cooking gadgets? Yes, I love them. It’s a forbidden love since I’m known for buying said gadgets and not using them for anything besides decoration. But I *might* use them, because they can be useful if given the right environment. Say… a person who cooks? I kid, I kid! I actually like to cook, and given that I’ve recently taken to a healthier style of foods sans added sugar, oil and salt, my limited indulgences in the pre-packaged foods arena has become even more limited. No worries. I have the internet to save me by providing a plethora of healthy vegan goodies that will keep me smiling until the end of my vacation. Maybe even a little longer…

These days, Thanksgiving isn’t about the first meal between the Native Americans and the pilgrims, sharing corn and laughs. I think we can all agree this is probably not how it went down. It also doesn’t really seem to be about giving thanks for the good things in our lives, although people do tend to throw that in at the end. No, this is about eating a dead bird. And this is something I do NOT support. At all. And I will not. I choose not to, and no matter what scenerio is brought in front of me, I can’t justify this act of betrayal.

And the “what” this thanksgiving dinner with my family.

I love my family more than anything in the world. They are good people. This year was going to be thanksgiving at my house, and I was ok with this. I can make amazing things like vegan pepperoni pizza and veggie burgers, desserts like brownies and cookies. Ok, so I’m not a traditionalist. But my brother told me yesterday he would not attend without the dead bird. So I said that’s fine, don’t attend.

And then I felt the guilt. Who am I to say he can’t eat his dead bird if he wants to. He doesn’t love animals, the environment or have a strong passion for much of anything. I love him so very much, but I am aware of the person that he is. This isn’t a judgement, or at least I don’t mean it to be. But it makes me sad to think about. He doesn’t love things, and this makes me sad. So I agreed to allow the dead bird in my house, to com… comp… compromise.

And I’ve felt sick ever since.

This “compromise” isn’t right. And animals shouldn’t live a life of pain and neglect and torture, and then be so gruesomely killed, so he can have an UNnecessary “tasty” meal. And I will not support it. So I made a counter offer to have dinner at my parents or out at a restaurant. I can suffer through watching him (or rather, all of them) eat the dead bird and dairy excretions (puss and blood and all), but I WILL NOT welcome this into my home. I spent the weekend hearing all about the horrible stalking and killing of innocent deer so these people could get their thrills. These people I love doing things I think is so very, very wrong. I was also witness to a bowl of dirty knives with pieces of said deer still on them and nearly vomited. I actually had to turn and hold my mouth while I dry-heaved. I don’t think I’ll be putting myself through this next year. I love my family, but it was too much.

I CAN compromise, but I don’t consider sacrificing my moral and ethical beliefs a “compromise”. Especially when it is completely and totally unnecessary. He doesn’t need the dead bird, and the lovely bird doesn’t need to die. It is a choice, the wrong choice, and I will not support it. I will not welcome it into my home.

And this is the first time, throughout this whole thing, that I no longer feel sick about my decision.

I was trying a new recipe for pizza dough, and it made a huge, pliable batch. I could have saved the extra and made another pizza later, but I was inspired by a commercial for Hot Pockets. I used to love Hot Pockets, especially the pepperoni ones that would ooze grease and oil when you bit into them. EWWW (well, this is what I think about that now, at least). Needless to say, I don’t miss the oozy grease or the ground animal bits, but I do miss the surprise. Oh, it looks like just a roll of bread, but SURPRISE, you’re meal’s inside! Yeah, I know I’m weird. I also like cookies like that, but that’s a whole other post.

The the stuffed part of this is just a pizza crust on the bottom, and another crust on the top. A lot like a huge calzone. Ok, exactly like that. What was so great about it that one piece was more than enough for a meal, so this last for several days/meals that I didn’t have to cook for. Don’t get me wrong, I love to make things. But when I get home from work, walk Doc, and then just want to put my feet up, to know there is a meal already ready for me, I hum with happiness. Just a few short seconds in the micro and voila! Delicious vegan stuffed pizza burning the inside of my mouth! Yes, I need to work on my patience.

So this weekend was one for the record books as far as time I spent in the kitchen. I guess I was inspired, or motivated, or hungry. Whatever the reason, I made a bunch of stuff that I’ll share with you now.

First was the bread. I found a cheap-o bread machine last week, and plus has a coupon for 20% off, so I thought, hell, why not? I like the idea of making my own bread. Have you looked at an ingredient list on a normal loaf of store-bought bread? It reads like a chemical composition of unpronounceable ingredients. I actually have one of these loaves that’s been in my fridge for over 9 months and NOT MOLDY. Yes, it still tastes fine, after 9 months. What the hell is in it that it doesn’t go bad after so many months? Whatever it is, it can’t be good for me.

So anyways, back to the bread machine. It’s a cheapy, so I don’t have super high hopes. Worst case, I hate it and take it back. Best case, I have yummy bread with a short ingredient list. So then to choose what kind of bread to make. I could have gone with the standard white bread, but truth is I don’t really like it. I prefer whole wheat, the nuttier and grainier, the better. The settings I went with were the normal ones (not the express), so it took, like, 3 hours or something to make. But it smelled so good and tasted even better!

This is what it looked like:

(I know, my camera is shitty and since I do most of my cooking at night, the photos are even worse!)

And this is what I made with it: a grilled cheese panini!!!!

Add a little bbq sauce for dipping and I am a happy chica!

Sweety humini, just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Maybe I’ll have that again for dinner to night. Hmmm….

Ok, so that was only the beginning. I also (finally) decided to actually make the carrot cake I’ve been thinking about for a month or more. You see, for me it’s all about motivation. If I don’t HAVE to do something, and I don’t really want to do it, I usually will not do it. It’s a trait I hate about myself, but it’s pretty low on the list so, well, whatever… Back to the carrot cake. What a fucking pain in the ass! It wasn’t complicated or anything, but since I’ve never before made carrot cake, I didn’t realize what a mess it would make. But the final product turned out really good (maybe a little undercooked, but very moist and wonderful). Add a little cream cheese frosting and VOILA! Heaven in my mouth. And I’ll be able to have this heavenly treat for a long time because the cake was HUGE (ok, so I doubled it. But only because I didn’t want to have half things in my fridge!).

Slice of carrot cake with cream cheese frosting:

And the leftovers:

And MORE leftovers:

Oh, and because OBVIOUSLY I wasn’t busy enough, I decided to attempt the pepperoni recipe from vegandad.blogspot.com. Ever since I went vegan almost 2 years ago, I’ve missed pizza. More specifically, pepperoni pizza. Yeah, I know it’s terrible for me and all that, but sweet mother of all that is yummy, it’s delicious.

I didn’t even know it was possible to make vegan pepperoni until a few months ago (or weeks, I can’t keep track of time). Well, it is possible. And, very easy! and it totally smells like pepperoni and tastes amazing! I’d like to say it tastes just like ordinary, dead-animal-carcass pepperoni… but honestly, I can’t remember. I’m pretty sure it does.

So in honor of the pepperoni, I decided to make pizza today. Ok, so it isn’t like I need a reason to make pizza.

Pizza with cheezy sauce and vegan pepperoni (before going into the oven):

And after:

And finally, I needed to make something for my lunches for the week at work. Since last week’s peanut sauce was so amazing, I decided to make it again with wide wheat noodles, cauliflower, tofu and green beans. Yes, I think we have another winner!

Peanut sauce on wide wheat noodles with tofu and veggies:

Bloody hell, my camera sucks unless it has a ton of light. Suckity suck sucks! I need to get a lamp or something when I take photos, and maybe a tripod. I think I actually have one in the garage. I’ll have to take a look.

So now I just need to choose what to have for dinner. My choices are: left over pepperoni pizza, grilled cheese,  or peanut tofu noodles. OR carrot cake.

Hmmmm these are the BEST kinds of decisions!

Bonus pic: Doc choosing the prime bed location:

Sometimes, however,  it isn’t in my control whether or not to deal with something head-on. Or from the side. Or at all. And since I know it is out of my control (well, not entirely but the alternative would have some nasty consequences) I just need to be patient. Again, not something I am very good at but I am getting better at it with age.

So what am I doing instead? Well, I’ve started Twilight again. Yes, I know I said it was like heroin and I could never pick it up again because it would trigger the addiction. But at this point, I will take that happy, fake feeling I have when reading this series. It just makes me happy. I can escape into a world that doesn’t exist but where everything works out in the end. So what if it’s not real. At this point, I will take it.

I will also be attempting to make bread and vegan pepperoni. I miss pepperoni pizza, and since I’m getting much better with pizza, I need my pepperoni fix. (I also need to add veggies.. but I feel like it ruins the pizza by making it healthy! Sick, I know…). I did find vegan pepperoni online, but it is so damn expensive, I decided to try to make my own. If I fail, then I’ll make the purchase. Who knows, maybe my homemade stuff will be amazing!

As for the wanting to deal with stuff but feeling like I’m idling, well, let’s just say I’ve been through worse. I’ll take the idling…

I spent the weekend (or at least a good few hours) watching online vegan cooking shows. There is no cable TV in my house, and even if there was, I don’t know of any vegan cooking shows. So I like to watch them online. I found a great website, EverydayDish.com, which has a number of fantastic cooking episodes with a few different hosts. Great stuff with totally yummy food.

So about this peanut sauce. There was a great episode with a very easy and tasty sounding recipe that you can find here. I made a few changes, like using rice noodles, cauliflower, carrots and peas. This is my lunch for the week, and first day conclusion: delicious!

Bonus photo: Doc, my love.

Today, I have to do my own cooking, so whatever possessed me to want to make a dish I’ve never actually eaten, I don’t know. Maybe because it was cold for a few days and felt like Fall, a time to make warm soups and bread and comfort foods all snuggled up on the couch.

So I happened upon a recipe that looked promising and thought “why not?” and got the ingredients. Everything in the chili I liked (or at least LIKE when mixed together), and it turned out quite well. I mean, I have nothing to compare it to, but the fact that I ate it says something.

I used this recipe as a starter, and also added some peppers, cherry tomatoes and quinoa to make it my own. The quinoa made it thicker, which I really liked (rice would probably also work), and the pepper and cherry tomatoes were used because I have a plethora in my garden I wanted to use them fresh.

I took it to work last week and ate with crackers. It was really good! For my first attempt at chili, I’d say it wasn’t too shabby.

I’m sure there are a few servings here, but I could see eating the whole bowl!

Oh. My. Garbonzo. This thing was amazing. A little spicy from the peppers, and a wonderfulness from the garlic, all wrapped up in a delicious tortilla (it was green… I dunno, maybe spinach or garden or something?).

People have always raved about tofu scramble, and I always thought “what’s the big deal?” Well, now I know. The big deal is a total party for my taste buds.

First, I used a fresh pepper from my garden (yeah, I know!)

Then I tossed that into the skillet with a little oil and red onion.

Then the good stuff — TOFU!

I let that cook for a few minutes, then added the spices.

Finally, I put on the tortilla, wrapped it up and chowed down.

Anyways, it was good. (I can’t wait to have the left overs tomorrow!)

I was flipping through my catalog of recipes, looking for tofu scramble, and came upon this recipe. Now, I haven’t made pancakes in (probably) years, so whatever possessed me to whip this up be beyond me. Well, I tried it and I CONQUERED IT!

Batter:

Making the first pancake…

Yes, even the FIRST pancake turned out edible.

My stack, with pure maple syrup… YUM YUM YUM. 

The “after” shot. 

This recipe made 6 very descent sized pancakes, so I’m saving the other 4 for breakfast (and maybe lunch, or a treat for Doc) for tomorrow, maybe with some sliced banana on top. Yeah, that sounds good.

Oh, and I still need to find that tofu scramble recipe…