Me Be VeG

Archive for the ‘rant’ Category

I hate it. I hate to compromise. I hate giving up on something I believe in and allow something I think it is wrong. I’m not talking about small things, those things I don’t look at as compromise, or at least not the same way. It’s easy for me to do something I don’t like if it makes someone else happy. What isn’t easy is to do something for one person that I KNOW will hurt another person, just to make person one happy. This is the situation I’m in right now.

These days, Thanksgiving isn’t about the first meal between the Native Americans and the pilgrims, sharing corn and laughs. I think we can all agree this is probably not how it went down. It also doesn’t really seem to be about giving thanks for the good things in our lives, although people do tend to throw that in at the end. No, this is about eating a dead bird. And this is something I do NOT support. At all. And I will not. I choose not to, and no matter what scenerio is brought in front of me, I can’t justify this act of betrayal.

And the “what” this thanksgiving dinner with my family.

I love my family more than anything in the world. They are good people. This year was going to be thanksgiving at my house, and I was ok with this. I can make amazing things like vegan pepperoni pizza and veggie burgers, desserts like brownies and cookies. Ok, so I’m not a traditionalist. But my brother told me yesterday he would not attend without the dead bird. So I said that’s fine, don’t attend.

And then I felt the guilt. Who am I to say he can’t eat his dead bird if he wants to. He doesn’t love animals, the environment or have a strong passion for much of anything. I love him so very much, but I am aware of the person that he is. This isn’t a judgement, or at least I don’t mean it to be. But it makes me sad to think about. He doesn’t love things, and this makes me sad. So I agreed to allow the dead bird in my house, to com… comp… compromise.

And I’ve felt sick ever since.

This “compromise” isn’t right. And animals shouldn’t live a life of pain and neglect and torture, and then be so gruesomely killed, so he can have an UNnecessary “tasty” meal. And I will not support it. So I made a counter offer to have dinner at my parents or out at a restaurant. I can suffer through watching him (or rather, all of them) eat the dead bird and dairy excretions (puss and blood and all), but I WILL NOT welcome this into my home. I spent the weekend hearing all about the horrible stalking and killing of innocent deer so these people could get their thrills. These people I love doing things I think is so very, very wrong. I was also witness to a bowl of dirty knives with pieces of said deer still on them and nearly vomited. I actually had to turn and hold my mouth while I dry-heaved. I don’t think I’ll be putting myself through this next year. I love my family, but it was too much.

I CAN compromise, but I don’t consider sacrificing my moral and ethical beliefs a “compromise”. Especially when it is completely and totally unnecessary. He doesn’t need the dead bird, and the lovely bird doesn’t need to die. It is a choice, the wrong choice, and I will not support it. I will not welcome it into my home.

And this is the first time, throughout this whole thing, that I no longer feel sick about my decision.

Loyalty. One of the most important traits to me. To have the back of people you care about speaks more to a person’s character than almost anything else. Now I’m not saying to ignore their mistakes or believe everything they say without question. No no no. When the chips are down and you turn your back on me, well, that speaks volumes. I will do everything I can to give you the benefit of the doubt, but if you can’t give anything in return, then there is a problem. (And, the problem isn’t mine.)

But on to better things. And by “better”, I mean the edible kind that doesn’t arrive in an unmarked package without a return address. haha! 4 more days until New Moon and 5 more days until V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N!

That is all.

Ok, I’ll be the first to admit I’m not he most confrontational person. In fact, there have been many times I’ve run from things I should have faced head-on. But I would like to think as I get older, I’ve learn to deal with things and learn to move past them. It isn’t always easy (actually, usually it’s a pain in the arse) but it’s better than avoiding life all together.

Sometimes, however,  it isn’t in my control whether or not to deal with something head-on. Or from the side. Or at all. And since I know it is out of my control (well, not entirely but the alternative would have some nasty consequences) I just need to be patient. Again, not something I am very good at but I am getting better at it with age.

So what am I doing instead? Well, I’ve started Twilight again. Yes, I know I said it was like heroin and I could never pick it up again because it would trigger the addiction. But at this point, I will take that happy, fake feeling I have when reading this series. It just makes me happy. I can escape into a world that doesn’t exist but where everything works out in the end. So what if it’s not real. At this point, I will take it.

I will also be attempting to make bread and vegan pepperoni. I miss pepperoni pizza, and since I’m getting much better with pizza, I need my pepperoni fix. (I also need to add veggies.. but I feel like it ruins the pizza by making it healthy! Sick, I know…). I did find vegan pepperoni online, but it is so damn expensive, I decided to try to make my own. If I fail, then I’ll make the purchase. Who knows, maybe my homemade stuff will be amazing!

As for the wanting to deal with stuff but feeling like I’m idling, well, let’s just say I’ve been through worse. I’ll take the idling…